I cant be my self this is not me?

After a bad experience from high school and unstoppable stress my mind become so sag and losing memories I can't think right and my decisions are wrong and mind is unstable and so negative people are making my life worse and I can't communicate or express my self I lost my social skills probably. I became so introvert person because people hate me with no reasons. I'm like this from 4 years and life is getting worse. And **** happens over and over again my parents are so Ingratitude and there zombie life sucks and my mother think she's the only one who have real problems in this world. I'm afraid life well keep like this I can't change it. But I wasn't the same person who I'm now and I'm struggling to find my old self again